The BIG P!
I want to write about this because I’ve been kind of (trying to make it not sound so bad!) procrastinating throughout the day! And I know I’m procrastinating because I get side tracked into doing other things! One of those things is cleaning the house – its a sure sign that I’m procrastinating and an even surer sign when the house is already clean!
Its something that I’ve been aware of for many years but awareness of something and actually changing it are two different things!!
One of the reasons I think I procrastinate is fear. The things that I procrastinate the most are those pressing things that give me the most reward, that are the most interesting and satisfying projects to be involved with. They are things that actually move me forward on all levels, so why do I procrastinate doing those things??
Fear. Fear of my own successes or failures. Fear of actually being good enough to complete something. I know there are other reasons and they all stem from childhood but I am grateful for awareness, to catch myself in the act so I can change it! Also getting to the root of the problem has been great for working through an issue that is actually more complicated than it appears to be.
Perhaps that is why my rock for today is tiny – so tiny it is only 3cm wide. And it’s simple. But it is still a beautiful rock and has a lovely energy when I hold it in my hand. I felt like painting something tiny today…
Hei apopo – until tomorrow!
The BIG P!